Machine Gun Kelly got raw about hitting rock bottom in a new Hulu documentary, Machine Gun Kelly’s Life in Pink.

He details a dark night in July 2020 shortly after his father died.

“I wouldn’t leave my [hotel] room,” he says. “I started getting really, really, really dark. Megan went to Bulgaria to shoot a movie and I started getting this really wild paranoia. Like, I kept getting paranoid that someone was gonna come and kill me.”

He was sleeping with a shotgun next to his bed and “just f**king snapped” that day.

“I called Megan. I was like, ‘You aren’t here for me.’ I’m in my room and I’m, like, freaking out on her,” he says. “Dude, I put the shotgun in my mouth. And I’m yelling on the phone and like the barrel’s in my mouth. And I go to cock the shotgun and the bullet, as it comes back up, the shell just gets jammed. Megan’s like dead silent.”

He says that was the moment he realized he needed to stop his substance abuse and get clean for Megan and his daughter, Casie.

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